Ancient Chinese Prophecy of Imminent Doom, huh?

So this was what my fortune cookie said the other night:

Now if that's literal, fantastic. I'd love to, say, go back to Europe, or maybe cross the Pacific to Japan. But fortune cookies tend to talk in metaphor more often than not, and if that's the case here, then I'm left thinking it's predicting my death. Maybe even threatening me.

You see? The really ARE out to get me! Even the Chinese restauranteurs (or at least their brethren who run Big Fortune Cookie in this country) are in this. No telling how far down the rabbit hole this goes...

(The moral of the story is, if you're paid to write fortune cookies, it's probably a little less unnerving for the customer to just come out and say "You'll be taking a trip soon, you lumpy, paranoid fool. And hey, maybe eat a vegetable once in awhile. I'm just sayin'.")

1 comment:

  1. I always add "in bed" at the end of fortunes for comedic effect, but adding it to this one just grossed me out.