Relive the humiliation in your own living room!

So I'm not sure how I feel about Wii Fit.

On the one hand, I'm exactly the sort of guy who could use something like this. I'm no danger to shipping or anything, but I'm not in great shape, either, and I hate the very idea of going to the gym because of A.) my deep-seeded hatred of gym people, and B.) my deep-seeded hatred of doing anything remotely athletic in the presence of other humans (I never claimed to not have issues, people). So in theory, this allows me the opportunity to help alter my sad state of fitness through the miracle of Hermitcise. And thankfully, some of the games are quite fun, making unique use of the Wii Balance Board and the additional (and unusual) efforts needed to play them.

But of course, there's a problem. And it's not the Wii Fit's over-reliance on Body Mass Index (BMI), which is apparently leading it to call more than a few athletic, well-muscled people overweight despite the mountains of evidence to the contrary. It's more of an attitude thing.

And not even mine, necessarily... it's Wii Fit's. The passive-aggressive chiding of the sim instructors. The Eddie Haskell-esque complimentary insults of the anthropomorphic Balance Board that shows up sometimes. The pixie-ish voice that sometimes says "Oh, my"
when you step onto the balance board. The utter despair your Mii sinks into when you rank poorly. It's all a bit much. They might as well have called it "Gym Class in a Box," because that's sure how it feels sometimes. And that's the sort of bullshit I've been happy to avoid since I graduated high school, thanks so much.

I'll keep using it for now - mostly out of guilt and the desire to get my money's worth out of the thing - but honestly, an aerial shot of my Mii sobbing alone in the middle of a soccer field doesn't exactly inspire me to do better next time. It just makes me want to return the thing to the store and exchange it for a different game I can play while sitting on my ass with the other slobs.


  1. I haven't played it much, but I found that style to be hilarious. I used to get beaten up, was always picked last in sports, and hated gym class. But rather than remind me of those days, I saw the Wii Fit as poking fun at the jock attitude. I simply cannot take a cartoon version of my childhood nightmares seriously, especially not with the high pitched voices they've thrown in, and instead found myself laughing at the Wii, insulting it right back ("What do you know? You use BMI to track everything!"), and sometimes even trying to get it to say something stupid. Actually, I spent time while my sister was on it trying to get her to mess up so it would say something stupid. Which I suppose isn't quite the same thing.

    If I got to use it more often, I don't know if I'd feel the same. But the little use I did get was great fun and I wish I could afford a Wii and Wii Fit for myself.

  2. I'll cop to exaggerating my feelings a bit for (alleged) comedic effect, but I'd never use words like "rational" or even "healthy" when it comes to the way I deal with my own insecurities, either. Just ask my wife... my poor, patient wife. :) So I'm not exaggerating as much as I'd like, unfortunately.

    It does have its fun points, though. As frustrating as the human Marble Madness type game is, it's also strangely addicting. And the basic Synchronized Stepping is good, too, like Dance Dance Revolution for the rhythmically challenged.

  3. I watched my sister do the marble game and the hoola hoops, and was impressed. I wanted to try the stepping as well, but didn't have time while I was there. My sister had the advanced level and kept laughing herself out of rhythm. I really want a Wii Fit. First I guess I have to save up for a Wii... *sigh*